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Posts Tagged ‘Critique group’

Tuesdays with Story

Meeting notes from Tuesday (of course), December 7

“Collaborative workshops and writers’ peer groups hadn’t been invented when I was young. They’re a wonderful invention. They put the writer into a community of people all working at the same art, the kind of group musicians and painters and dancers have always had.” 
― Ursula K. Le Guin, Steering the Craft: Exercises and Discussions on Story Writing for the Lone Navigator or the Mutinous Crew

Five writers presented their work at Tuesdays meeting. Here are some of the comments they received.

John Schneller

Precious Daughter

Most found the chapter engaging. Amit appreciated the change in tension when storylines jump from Nia to Kotel. Kashmira thought the dialogue should be given prior to the hawk catching the breeze and exiting. Larry noticed that I like to have minds ‘bounce’ a little too often. Thanks for reading.

Bob Kralapp

“Don’t Take It Personally”

Mike wanted to know if there was anything Kenny and the narrator respected about the coach that would make them feel his betrayal in betting on the game. Or if he was just another authority figure. Amber felt that the story read a lot more streamlined than before. She and several others agreed there should be something more at the end that would bring it around and make it feel more finished.

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Writer’s Mail

Tuesdays with Story
September, 20, 2021

The first word . . .

“We are all apprentices in a craft where no one ever becomes a master.”
—Ernest Hemingway

Tuesday evening in person and on Zoom . . .

Presenters:

Amit Trivedi  

1. Jerry felt that it was incomplete. It need closure.
2. Bob and kashmira liked the Passage of time (dusk-night-morning)
3. Jack had quite a few suggestions
4. Mike and Larry thought the portrayal of the old men was realistic.

Thanks!

Kashmira Sheth (chapters 2-3, Nina Soni, Best Hostess) – Kashmira read from chapter two of Nina Soni, Best Hostess. Overall, the comments were positive. Larry liked how these chapters were progressing. Jack suggested tweaking a word to fit Nina’s word-loving personality and Jaimie and Larry had ideas on how to improve some parts of the story. Jerry wondered if Nina’s father going to be a list-maker like her and Amber wanted to know if the story will cover the entire six weeks of her grandmother and cousin’s visit. John pointed out that bouncy goes more with bunnies than flowers. Thank you.

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Tuesday with Story

August 17, 2021

First word…

Most humor depends on specificity. It’s funnier to say that a cheese steak tastes better when you’re leaning up against a Pontiac than when you are leaning up against a car.

– Calvin Trillin

Here’s who presented Tuesday evening…

Kashmira Sheth – (Chapter 1, Nina Soni, Best Hostess and chapter 10, rewrite, Nina Soni, Snow Spy)…I submitted the first chapter of Nina Soni, Best Hostess. The main concern was keeping things simple for new readers, using active voice, and maybe playing around with a different starting point. All were excellent suggestions. I also resubmitted a revised chapter of  Nina Soni, Snow Spy. There were no major concerns there. Thank you all.

John Schneller (Chapters 16-17, Precious Daughter)…Jerry wanted to clear up some disparity on fishing, both the numbers, and what ones does with a grub once it in your hands. Larry wanted clarity on how long the boys would help cooking. Amit pointed out too much falling in the dance, while Kashmira pointed out that it slows down when the dance routine was described twice. Jamie noticed Kotel was a bystander in the opening. These things can be fixed! Thanks to all for the keen powers of observation.

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