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Writer’s Mail

Posted in Newsletter, tagged , , , , on September 5, 2021| Leave a Comment »

Tuesday with Story

August 17, 2021

First word…

Most humor depends on specificity. It’s funnier to say that a cheese steak tastes better when you’re leaning up against a Pontiac than when you are leaning up against a car.

– Calvin Trillin

Here’s who presented Tuesday evening…

Kashmira Sheth – (Chapter 1, Nina Soni, Best Hostess and chapter 10, rewrite, Nina Soni, Snow Spy)…I submitted the first chapter of Nina Soni, Best Hostess. The main concern was keeping things simple for new readers, using active voice, and maybe playing around with a different starting point. All were excellent suggestions. I also resubmitted a revised chapter of  Nina Soni, Snow Spy. There were no major concerns there. Thank you all.

John Schneller (Chapters 16-17, Precious Daughter)…Jerry wanted to clear up some disparity on fishing, both the numbers, and what ones does with a grub once it in your hands. Larry wanted clarity on how long the boys would help cooking. Amit pointed out too much falling in the dance, while Kashmira pointed out that it slows down when the dance routine was described twice. Jamie noticed Kotel was a bystander in the opening. These things can be fixed! Thanks to all for the keen powers of observation.

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Writer’s Mail

Posted in Newsletter, tagged , , , , on July 1, 2011| Leave a Comment »

Writer’s Mail
Tuesdays With Story
June 30, 2011

“You can’t wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.” — Jack London

Tuesday at B&N . . .
Liam – Chapter 3 of Fog-Gotten — Andrea thought that Liam should spend more time talking about the dead person instead of seeming to brush by it in passing. Jack mentioned a few continuity problems. Liam said he’s going to fix them. Jennifer wondered if the main character was inside or outside. It was difficult for her to tell. Jack asked if we needed to read about all the calendar stuff? He thought that Liam should consider how to structure this section. Building a crescendo? Rebecca wanted the main character to be more curious about being outside.

Jennifer – Chapter 1 of Dreams of the Future — Cole said that he enjoyed the story. He liked the flashbacks, but was concerned about how often and quickly they occur. He would like to see more set in the present. Jack agreed and said that Jennifer should establish a relationship with the reader. Set the scene and establish character. Cole would like a longer scene. Jack said that throwing in the red dress doesn’t take the reader where he/she needs to be to go reminiscing. Proust reference. Bruce Catton memoir reference. Liam has concerns about the name “Mystique”. Jen liked it. Andrea was looking for support for introducing such an exotic name. There was a long group discussion about the red dress and what it meant and how much detail should be introduced up front. There was also a discussion about the tone of the piece. It had shadings of a romance novel for some people, but Jennifer insisted that it wasn’t one. Jen asked about the poem at the end and wondered why it was there.

Jack – The Golden Fleece II — Jen wanted to know if the kids would have recovered enough to speak in full sentences. Rebecca wanted to know if they should stumble more as they run. She liked the bits about how they hurt their feet. There was a group discussion about how the “energy” that Sean and Claire had was likely the result of adrenaline coursing through their bodies. Cole liked the passage about his “hands at his eyebrows, saluting the retreating sun”. Jack said to look for the Celtic myth references in the upcoming section of this chapter. (more…)

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Writer’s Mail

Posted in Newsletter, tagged , , , on January 1, 2011| Leave a Comment »

Tuesdays with Story
WRITER’S MAIL for December 31, 2010
by Clayton Gill

Good Words from Way Back
“There is a woman in the state of Nevada to whom I once lied continuously, consistently, and shamelessly, for the matter of a couple of hours. I don’t want to apologize to her. Far be it from me. But I do want to explain. Unfortunately, I don’t know her name, much less her present address. If her eyes should chance upon these lines, I hope she will write to me.” – Jack London (1876-1916), opening paragraph in The Road (1907).

Last Call for the Holidays
You’re still invited: Saturday, January 8, 2:00 p.m. join fellow TWS members at the home of Jerry Peterson and Marge Smith Peterson for their Post-Christmas get-together.

However, please do the following: (1) Let Jerry know you’re coming ; (2) ask fellow TWS writers about carpooling (Clayton Gill, Millie Mader, and Randy Haselow still have a backseat in a Honda Civic); and (3) bring post-Christmas reading to the party for barter or banter.

Reading Recap: December 28 Meeting
Second and Fourth group met at the Sundance Theater & Café in the Hilldale Mall to hear work by Kim Simmons, Terry Hoffman, Randy Haselow, Leah Wilbur, and Holly Bonnicksen-Jones.

Kim Simmons read from a chapter of City of Winter. Members offered a number of questions: Why does Ryoko trust the voices that claim to be Fate and Destiny? What distinguishes the two? Why is she horrified by the encounter? One suggestion was that Ryoko should test the accuracy of the unseen writer. Even creepier would be if her thoughts appeared on the page. Other questions for Kim included: Why does Ryoko sometimes slip into a modern and slangy idiom? What’s with all the loose women surrounding the king? And, why does the king, having only met the disguised Ryoko for the first time, now entrust her to lead an important mission?

Terry Hoffman presented Chapter 6 of The Tome. Members commended Terry for “great descriptions.” They also noted needless repetition in the protagonist’s internal monologues. Questions for Terry included: What should we make of Aunt Ace? Do we trust her? The Tome seems to corrupt the relationships of those who desire it – is that idea important to the story? (more…)

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