Writer’s Mail
February 19, 2014
First and Third Meeting February 18, 2014 at Barnes and Noble
Cindi shares part of her novel North Road. Lisa notices there’s a lot of introspection, but she would like to learn more from the narrative and dialogue instead. Andy suggests changing the POV to first person. Pat liked the interplay between characters at the dinner scene but she agrees that she should get to the end faster. Millie thought some of the descriptions were beautiful. Overall, there’s a little too much telling and not enough showing. Jerry suggests cutting the last sentence.
Andy reads from two short stories. The first story; Millie and Lisa thought it was interesting. Lisa wonders if it should be longer. Pat asks a question about word choice. Ruth wonders why one character doesn’t have a bigger reaction to being slapped. Cindi wonders if the character can go without the slap and instead throw something to the ground. As for the second story; Lisa thinks there’s a section that could get cut right away. Pat wonders why the clone would be clothed. Jerry has a problem with the face of the clone. Pat wonders how the clone is able to speak at the end. John wonders if the first line could be skipped altogether.
Amit reads from an untitled work. Jerry and Pat wonder whose story it is. The first person we meet is not the main character, but his daughter and fiancée are. Pat thinks the garden scenes and the kitchen scenes were really well done and very descriptive of all five senses. (more…)