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Posts Tagged ‘Bob Simon’

Writer’s Mail
Tuesdays with Story
February 20, 2015

He said it . . .
On writing and stories, whether print or television . . . “It’s the words. It’s all about the words.” – Bob Simon, television correspondent (1941-2015)

From Tuesday evening’s gathering of first-and-thirders . . .
Lisa McDougal read from chapter twenty-six of Tebow Family Secret. Alicia Connolly-Lohr thought the waiters would have fancy dress and wondered if one character would stab at another instead of impaling them and nick them so there would be blood, but the cops wouldn’t be called. Kashmira Sheth wanted to know why Lisa needed this scene. Jerry Peterson wondered why they would serve pasties at this particular restaurant, but Lisa let us know they’re supposed to be pastries. Amber Boudreau questioned a few lines of one character’s dialogue. Jerry pointed to a few lines he thought were overwritten, but it might have come from an earlier version.
Amber read some flash fiction. Kashmira suggested shortening the front end and getting into the story faster. Jerry thought the narrator should get nicked and be in a bit more peril before he is saved from his vision.

Alicia read from Chapter 11 of Coastie Girl. Lisa was interested in reading more after reading this chapter. Judith McNeil thought it was realistic. Pat Edwards thought the internal dialogue didn’t match some of the other narration in places and questioned the strength of the language. Jerry had trouble with the crew
“running around.” Kashmira was looking for some more impact on the main character in one scene in particular.

Amit Trivedi read from a revision of Chapter Thirteen. Pat likes it when they make her look things up and enjoyed the descriptions about the hut. Lisa thought the descriptions went a little long in the beginning. Lisa has a question about the next Chapter. It’s unclear who has read it or not, but Kashmira answered the question. Jerry wanted the main character of chapter thirteen to perform a specific action in the work. Pat wondered whether this is adult fiction or young adult. Kashmira suggested it could be new adult. Jerry thought Chapter fourteen really started on the second page. (more…)

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