Tuesdays with Story

Tuesdays with Story
April 5, 2022

The first word . . .

“Drama is the way of holding the reader’s attention. The basic formula for drama is setup, buildup, payoff—just like a joke. The setup tells us what the game is. The buildup is where you put in all the moves, the forward motion, where you get all the meat off the turkey. The payoff answers the question, Why are we here anyway? What is it that you’ve been trying to give? Drama must move forward and upward, or the seats on which the audience is sitting will become very hard and uncomfortable.” – Anne Lamott (bird by bird).

Tuesday evening April 5, 2022

Seven TWS writers came together over Zoom (mostly) this week to review the works-in-progress of four of their colleagues and offer insights and critiques. They also got a look at Larry’s freshly minted bookmarks! Here is a summary of what was said:

— Kashmira Sheth (Journey to Swaraj, 7-9) …Kashmira submitted chapters of Journey to Swaraj. Larry thought that the story has improved from the previous draft. Daniel liked what the description of the food evoked. John had some logistic concerns and Bob suggested places where the story can be deepened. Jaime pointed out places where the story could be tightened. Thank you all for reading and sharing your comments.  

— Dan Culhane (A Grand Thing To Be An Afternoon, Ch. 1) Dan submitted a few introductory chapters for the novel. In general the group thought the concept was intriguing and the exposition of the first few sections kept them interested. A consensus seemed to emerge that it was perhaps asking too much of a reader for the story to start off with so much history—better to allow the history to emerge through the characters as they move through the world. Jaime suggested the Favel scene, for example, may work better as an entry point. It was also suggested that the current opening vignette with Aikken on the hilltop lacked an engaging conflict. All very helpful feedback for the author and much appreciated.

— John Schneller (Precious Daughter, Ch. 33) …A series of problems were identified. Clarity needs work on where the arrow came from to take down Oltan, how Torgard got in position to stop Oltan’s counterattack, and how big a snapping turtle is …. and how skilled are turtles at planning counterattacks. Unfortunately, Oltan is tough to kill. Once again Nia’s presence has been requested. Chapter 34 is her turn….

— Bob Kralapp (“A Pink Mask”) … Although there are a few markers in the story as to when it is happening, Larry felt that another was needed, and early on, to nail down the time. John didn’t have a clear image of Shannon given what I’d written. Mike wanted to know what circumstances have made Morris the way he is.

Who’s up next . . . 

On April 19, we currently have five writers on deck:

Mike Austin (??)

Dan Culhane (A Grand Thing To Be An Afternoon, alternative beginning)

John Schneller (Precious Daughter, Ch. 33)

Bob Kralapp (??)

Larry Sommers (??)

Our editor . . .

Dan Culhane is the editor for the April issues of Writer’s Mail. He would appreciate your news and any other items of interest that would serve. Please email Dan if you have some such material and he’ll include it in the next issue.

You sure about that word?

Is it prone, prostrate, or supine? Farther or further? Abdicate or abnegate? What’s the plural of filet mignon? I’ve always been fascinated by the way language changes over time and how the words themselves come to be used in ways they never once were used. Whenever I’m not quite “sure about that word,” I check to see what Garner’s Modern English Usage (now in its fourth edition) has to say. This dictionary shows you where thousands of word and phrase variations fall on the spectrum of common usage in English language print and recorded sources. And it’s fun to read! Check it out if you want to avoid slipshod extensions, mondegreens, and needless variants in your work.

The last word . . .

“In a story by Albert Camus there is a man writing a book for thirty years, and he never gets past polishing the first beautiful paragraph.” Royal Bank of Canada, The Communication of Ideas 81 (rev. ed. 1972).