Tuesdays with Story

TWS News:

The first word . . .

“Start writing, no matter what. The water does not flow until the faucet is turned on.”

― Louis L’Amour (1908-1988), novelist and short story writer

Tuesday evening at Alicia Ashman . . .

Amber Boudreau returned to the group, and she brought brownies to power the group while they critiqued the works of six of their colleagues. Here is some of what was said:

— Larry Sommers (chapters 33-35, Freedom’s Purchase) . . .  Several people commented on the apparent infrequency of letters home from Anders once he was in the Army. Huckle asked what was the point of the section in which Maria watches the mustering-in ceremony from the bleachers. Jack opined that it shows Maria has accepted Anders’ decision to enlist. There were concerns over Crawley¹s confrontation with Anders was he consistent in the way he communicated his threat, and would Anders been surprised by his presence after a month of basic training drills? The focus on baby John Oliver’s nursing drew attention from Huckle and Amber, because (1) Maria may not have wanted to wean him early due to economics, and (2) even though he was cutting teeth, the nursing process would not be “traumatic” to Maria as described. All in all, several important points to ponder. Thanks, all.

— Jack Freiburger (3 poems, Canticles for the Central Highlands) . . . Larry, being a saint, edited the entire chapbook and has been very encouraging with comments.  I think this damn thing is now done, after being stuck on Paradiso for about two years seeking a single image.  Will move Paradiso to after Inferno as suggested, to improve the context. and start entering it in competitions.  We will see if old fashioned poetry, paraphrasticism and all, can be published.

Finally finishing  Canticle, I found that the message is the same as in Bray Head, where I needed 300 pages to make the same point.  No one can say I’m not consistent.  Believe I’ve spent about 15 years on this one chunk of poetry, but therapy was the goal and the writing was helpful. I am now just mad north by north west.  When the wind is southerly, I too know a hawk from a handsaw.

— Huckleberry Rahr (chapters 3-4, YA novel) – . . . This week I got some great information on avoiding words that end in “ly”. I was informed that I need to shorten my paragraphs. I should re-examine the dad and his reactions to Jade heading to Florida.

— John Schneller (chapter 13, Broken rewrite) – . . . A few comments, mostly on logistics. Jerry reminded the author that the protagonist was carrying a knife and didn’t need a wimpy stick to defend himself. Hopefully the author would have a better memory if he ever had to defend himself in real life. Amber reminded me that Broken can’t push to his feet if he only has one “feet”. That would be a feat!!

— Melissa Zernick (poem, The Week Before Christmas) – . . .

— Kashmira Sheth and Amit Trivedi (chapters 33-35, untitled novel) . . . Translate the sun god hymn.
Need a ‘stronger’ reaction from Uma when Shivdas says he will go to the hospital
Show Uma’s internal thoughts regarding Hari before this chapter. Revise chapter 29.
Have Jaya say to Uma something about Hari.
Thanks, Amit

Who’s up next . . . December 17

Kashmira Sheth and Amit Trivedi (chapters, untitled novel)

Paul Wagner (???)

Chris Zoern (???)

Mike Austin (???)

Amber Boudreau (Chapters 13 and 14, Mavis)

Jerry Peterson (???)

Also this month . . .

December 17, we will again meet at the Alicia Ashman Branch Library in the High Point Shopping Center. Do bring Christmas cookies. For your GPS, the library’s address is 733 North High Point Road.

Also Jack Freiburger continues as our editor for Writer’s Mail’s. If you have good news you’d like to share with the group, do email it to Jack now for the next issue.

The last word . . .

“Read a thousand books, and your words will flow like a river.”

― Lisa See (1955-), novelist