Tuesdays with Story

Writer’s Mail
Tuesdays with Story
March 1, 2019

Back again at last!

One short of a dozen writers returned to B&N Westside on Feb 19th to critique the works of five of their colleagues. We were not snowed out, rained out or froze out – something to celebrate. Here are summaries of some of the things that were said:

Larry Sommers (Letter to the Editor of the Svenska Dagsbladet) . . . Jerry wants to know how the doctor knows the ages of the children he’s never met and suggests adding the word about. The story drew Tracey in, but she didn’t think it was a letter to the editor. Maybe if he got rid of the beginning and end. Jack didn’t think it was arch enough and recommended making it more “Dickensian,” with a real letter to the editor and then a letter to the author’s sister with the whole (short) story. Jean enjoyed the interaction between the main character and the young girl. Amber was a little unclear as to what the author’s goal was.

Amit Trivedi (chapters 7-8, untitled novel) . . . Jack had a problem with the flow in ch 7. Along those lines Cindi thought the end of ch7 was a little too abrupt and was looking for more transition between memories. In ch 8 Jack wants to know why people are risking life and limb by sticking around. Jerry assumed it was a cultural expectation. Jack and Larry wonder what will happen when these two characters meet again. Jean thought the main character’s need to help bury the dead connected her to the character.

Jack Freiburger (chapters 28-29, A Walk upon the Water) . . . Larry liked a few lines in particular. Tracey thought there was a bit that could be cut and that there’s a fine line between spinning a yarn and putting the reader to sleep. Jack agrees Hedges is the longest two pages in the world and these are the last skimmable chapters in the book. Larry had some suggestions for trimming down a few paragraphs.

Tracey Gemmell (chapter 7, Lavender Wine) . . . Group suggested a few areas needed clarifying, especially the timeline on the trip to Brighton. Cindi noted a few word choice issues. Larry and Jean felt the section about the e-reader was unnecessary for moving the plot forward. All agreed the family should not be stored in the storage locker. Not even if Tracey makes air holes in the door. Many thanks for your help.

Jerry Peterson (chapter 15, Night Flight) . . . Several suggested that Leander Parton not refer to Rooster as a one-arm pilot in his introduction to the others he’s hired, that one of the new pilots should see Rooster as missing an arm and react to it, expressing, if by nothing more than a look, his doubt that this man can fly an airplane. Several also asked that Jerry write a new scene showing how a chain of three linemen start the engine of a DeHavilland biplane, to clear up confusion about how this process works.

Who’s up next

March 5

Millie Mader (poem)

Kashmira Sheth and Amit Trivedi (chapters, untitled novel)

John Schneller (chapter 4, Broken)

Paul Wagner (???)

Jack Freiburger (chapters, A Walk upon the Water)

Cindi Dyke (chapter, The Mansion Secrets)

Jerry Peterson (chapter 16, Night Flight)

Public radio word program coming to Madison

A Way with Words, a public radio show about language, comes to our town next week. It will be at the Union Theater on the UW campus, March 7, at 8 p.m. Google it, then go online to get tickets.

Program hosts Martha Barnette and Grant Barrett talk with callers about slang, old sayings, new words, grammar, word origins, regional dialects, family expressions, and speaking and writing well. They settle disputes, play word quizzes, and discuss language news and controversies.

A Way with Words has been on the air for 20 years and draws a weekly audience of more than a half-million listeners.

WHAD Public Radio (Delafield-Milwaukee) broadcasts the show in our area on Sundays at 9 a.m.

New Writer’s Mail editor for March

Larry Sommers returns to the editorship this month. He will gin out two issues. If you have writing news that you would like him to include in either, email it to Larry.