Tuesdays with Story

Writer’s Mail
Tuesdays with Story
November 6, 2018

At ye olde bookshop

Seven TWS writers gathered around a real table at B&N Westside to work through the submissions of five of their colleagues. Here are some of the comments shared:

Lisa McDougal (chapter 7, The Tebow Family Secret) . . . Jerry felt that this version of Ahna is wimpy. Group suggested Glenn’s more character development. There was so incorrect phrasing issues that needs to be fixed. Visual setting needs to be flushed out more. Overuse of 2 words.

Jack Freiburger (chapter 19, A Walk Upon the Water) . . . The mid part of Lester’s foundation tale seemed well received.  There were a few grammar discussions, use of parenthesis, etc., but readers reported they enjoyed the chapter and the written comments were supportive.   Lester’s first tale will wrap up next meeting and then we will proceed form fantasy to adventure to disaster  as Sean comes back into focus.

Cindi Dyke (chapters 1 and 2, The Mansion Secrets) . . .  Everyone seemed to agree that the backstory should be moved into the present so I will be re-working that. Lisa thought the descriptive narratives were well done but too lengthy. Jerry suggested the cat be frightened into jumping into a tree instead of the roof of the garage to make it more believable. Thanks to all for your input.

John Schneller (chapter 4 rewrite, Final Stronghold) . . .  The chapter from Final Stronghold seemed easier to follow than the main storyline. Useful, suggestions with word choices and sentence structure helped to clarify moments in the story. While some moments provided enough surprise and engagement, a couple places require a response by those acted upon.  All helpful!!!!

Jerry Peterson (an essay for 80 Candles, “Memories”, also a short story, “Wanted: Grave Digger”) . . . The endings for both stirred a fair amount of discussion, John Schneller wanted the ending for “Grave Digger” shortened to “Damn, I’ve sure blown this job” while Jack Freiburger suggestion a way to wrap the ending back to Daggett being a Marine. He also suggested wrapping the ending “Memories” back to the faded picture of Squeak the squirrel that launched the story.

Who’s up next

November 20

Amit Trivedi (???)

Tracey Gemmell (chapters, Lavender Wine)

Jack Freiburger (chapters 20-21, A Walk Upon the Water)

Bob Kralapp (short story, part 2, “Capacity”)

Larry Sommers (chapter, Izzy)

Amber Boudreau (chapter, Avice)

December

Planning ahead, we depart B&N in December, meeting that month at the Alicia Ashman Branch Library. December 4, we will shoe-horn ourselves into the small meeting room. However, on December 18 we get the big meeting room. So plan for a party that night . . . bring cookies and egg nog to share or some other festive beverage.

January

It’s a Fifth Tuesday month. Yes, January 29. Tracey Gemmell will host the group at her home high above New Glarus. We need a writing challenge for that night. Bring your thoughts and ideas to our November 20 meeting, and we’ll decide then.

Our editor

For this month, it’s Amber Boudreau.  Please send her some good stuff you’ve found in your reading that pertains to writing that she can share in our next issue.

Contest

Ready to have some fun, show off your writing skills, and win some prizes? Enter Writing Academy’s first Short Story Contest! Free to enter!

Here are the highlights:

• Submit a 1,000 to 3,000 word short story by Sunday, December 9th
• Finalists compete for a $1000 Writing Academy Gift Certificate (enough for a 1-year Author’s Success Subscription!)
• Use this contest as a credential to market your work

Visit the following for all the details: https://blog.writingacademy.com/short-story-contest-2018/

Happy Writing!