Tuesdays with Story

Writer’s Mail
Tuesdays with Story
July 22, 2016

 — Tom Gauld

Sizzlin’ Summer Round-up from 1^st/3rd

Kashmira Seth submitted the first three chapters of Journey to Swaraj, HF set in 1930, India. These were revised chapters and most people found them moving along well. There was some discussion about a few cultural things and about buffalos! Since Kashmira grew up next to people who kept buffaloes she hopes she was able to answer the questions correctly.

The group generally liked Judith McNeils’s “The Lettuce Bug and Me”, a short children’s book.  Suggestions to change the title and to work out a better rhyme on page 3 where it got “bumpy” and out of sync.  Kashmira offered to give Judith a couple of references to publishers who specialize in children’s books, when she’s ready.

Nora O’Reilly – The group reviewed the second chapter of Bill McCormick’s Bliss. They suggested that in the scene when Bill flashes back to biking down Charter Street and viewing the destruction following the Sterling Hall bombing that I make several changes. The use of the word ‘rubble’ might be inappropriate. Also honing in on a specific personal item that charred but intact may focus the reader’s lens on the sadness of the event. I also need to be careful with flashbacks, making sure there is a logical, if small, cue to trigger the character’s memory. Also the knees, not thighs, of the sixty-year old monk would ‘beg for reprieve.’ And lastly, I must be parsimonious with my use of both adjectives and adverbs except in dialogue.
I love all the honest feedback, I have a long way to go, but I’m enjoying the ride!

Hannah Marshall’s poems “Boys” and “Unexpected” were both well received by the group. The majority of the discussion revolved around the last couple of stanzas in “Boys.” Nora questioned if “the knight” might be better as “a knight,” Pat asked for more concrete examples, and the word choice “persistent” was questioned.

Millie Mader’s “Highway Man” poem was well received. She loved the original Alfred Noyes poem from back in school, and has two Royal Doulton toby mugs depicting “Dick Turpin” the original Highway Man.

Jerry Peterson (short story, “The Letter”) . . . John Schneller suggested that the responsibility of American soldier/father of the twins born to an Afghani woman be upped by having the woman be a victim of an honor killing, now he has to in some way look after the children. Pat Edwards wanted that responsibility to be more clearly passed on by the soldier/father to his American son following the father’s suicide.

• Thanks, everyone!

Finding an ending

NPR’s Lynn Neary interviewed British author Susie Steiner about her new thriller, Missing, Presumed, recently and asked, “When you were working out the plot, what were you thinking about how a novel of this kind might end?”

Said Steiner, “Endings are enormously difficult. You’ve thrown all this stuff into the air, and you’re trying to bring it all in to land in a way that is satisfying but is not so fictional that it appears too tidy or too unrealistic. And that’s a very difficult thing to do.

“I’m a huge rewriter, so I do draft upon draft upon draft, and that provides an opportunity to backlay clues. So there was an awful lot of putting clues in, taking them out again, putting them back in, worrying it was then obvious.

“It’s a difficult thing not to let people know on page 10 who did it. And that’s a delicate balance because the reader wants to be a co-sleuth – that’s part of the joy – but also not to work it out too early.”

Missing, Presumed is Steiner’s third novel. If you’d like to listen to the full interview, here’s the link.

• Thanks, Jerry!

Who’s up next . . .

July 26:

August 2: Pat Edwards (???), Randy Slagel (part 4, “Watered-Down Witch”), Amber Boudreau (chapter 4, The Dragoneer), Amit Trivedi (chapter 25, part 1, novel), John Schneller (chapter 2, Final Stronghold), Cindi Dyke (chapter, North Road), and Bob Kralapp (poem, “March Morning at the Library”).

August 9:

August 16: Mike Austin (chapter 13, Before I Leave), Millie Mader (poem), Hannah Marshall (poems), Nora O’Reilly (chapter, Bill McCormick’s Bliss), Eva Mays (chapter, Dhuoda), Judith McNeil (???), and Jerry Peterson (???).

Fifth Tuesday . . .

Here’s the writing challenge for our August Fifth Tuesday: A superhero makes a career change. Do not identify the superhero you select in your story, but do plant enough clues that readers can guess who it is.

Max length: 500 words

Editors, oh, do we have them . . .

It’s Pat Edwards for the remainder if July, followed by John Schneller in August, and Eva Mays  in August. If you have good stuff about writing, books, or the publishing business that you’d like to share with our colleagues, now you know who to send it to.