WRITER’S MAIL
Tuesdays With Story
August 20,2015
Aug. 18th Meeting
Jerry Peterson’s chapters 9-12 from his crime novella, Killing Ham, drew two comments of significance. First, when Carsarota steps on a Matchbox car with his bare foot, while coming down the stairs in the dark, it has to draw more than an ouch and a muttered swear word. Casarota has to yowl, said several, because it really hurts. Second, the title… “When I first saw the title,” Pat Edwards said, “I thought it must have something to do with the Bible story of Ham.” In chapter 11, someone bombs a truck carrying hogs to a slaughter plant, thus the title, “Killing Ham.”
Lisa’s The Tebow Family Secret, chapters 34 and 35 were well received. Jerry commented that the horse accident in Chapter 34 didn’t seem realistic. He said that a buck wouldn’t run towards a horse as it would view the horse as a predator. He also mentioned that if Izzy had hit her head on a rock, she may have been knocked unconscious and probably wouldn’t have remembered all of the details of her previous life at once. So Pat suggested that Izzy should fall on dirt and that possibly the horse would be startled by a snake. Everyone liked Chapter 35, mentioned that the ending definitely was a page turner.
Monette Bebow-Reinhard, “Life Of A Job As Told In Fortune Cookies,” shared a fictional memoir short story and was given valuable feedback, such as being told that it felt like a first-person story told in third person. While the suggestion was also made to turn it into first person, she liked the idea of seeing how a third person “intimate” might be received on the market. Jerry suggested that she explain the nature of the family business. In the reading, it was reiterated how well reading our material out loud was.
For Judith’s story, “Walking In,” there was some confusion over who was related to whom. Judith was reworking story line in regards to the protagonist. Pat and Mo suggested that Marian should have a sledge hammer as well as a drill to knock down the dining room wall. Jerry felt that the set up at the beginning of the story was pointing to a family blow out at Anna’s funeral.
“Report,” the poem by Bob was extolled as beautiful, wonderful descriptions, broken up by some ever day life comments. Jerry liked the line about the death-defying chase, but felt that the rest of the line didn’t measure up to what came before. Pat liked the part about the sheets and blanket being folded into furrows. The group wondered if the poem was finished. Bob said he wasn’t sure.
WHO’S UP NEXT
August 25: Rebecca Rettenmund (chapter 1, rewrite, Lookout), Holly Bonnicksen-Jones (chapter 1, Coming Out Of The Rain)
September 1: Lisa McDougal (chapter 36, Tebow Family Secret), Pat Edwards (???), Cindi Dyke (chapter 18, North Road), Kashmira Sheth & Amit Trivedi (chapter, novel), Millie Mader (epilogue, Life on Hold), Judith McNeil (short story, part 2, Walking In), and Bob Kralapp (???).
September 8: ???
September 15: Lisa McDougal (chapter 37, Tebow Family Secret), Cindi Dyke (chapter, North Road), Kashmira Sheth & Amit Trivedi (chapter, novel), Mo Bebow-Reinhard (???), Bob Kralapp (???), and Jerry Peterson (chapters 13-16, Killing Ham).
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Tuesdays with Story 
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