Tuesdays with Story

Tuesdays with Story
WRITER’S MAIL for August 27, 2011

Good Words from Way Back
“Grown-ups never understand anything for themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explaining things to them.” –from Le Petit Prince (1943) by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1900-1944).

Fifth Tuesday: Writing Challengers
Pat Edwards notes that nine have entered the Fifth Tuesday Writing Challenge — “That is so unlike me!” – and sent or promised their stories, poems, or essays for reading on Tuesday, August 30.

Our Writing Challengers are: Brandy, Clayton, Greg, Jennifer (Rafini), Jerry, Judith, Liam, Millie, and Rebecca.

We’re starting at 7:00 p.m. at the country estate of Chris and Joe Lacey (49 London Road, near London Depot, north of Cambridge and east of Deerfield).

This event is potluck, so bring food to share. Also, bring lawn chairs and pointy sticks. And, if you need a ride from Madison, contact Clayton before 12:00 p.m. on Tuesday.

Reading Recap: August 23 Meeting
The Second-and-Fourth group met at Barnes & Nobel Westside. Thanks for Holly Bonnicksen-Jones for the following summary.

Katelin Cummins read the synopsis of her book, Battle of Sista (Part 1), the first of a series of four books. Cole suggested that the “power rocks” sound too generic. The rocks should have a name that relates to a specific place in the world she has created or have some significant term. Jim suggested looking into ley lines (alleged alignments of a number of places of geographical interest, such as ancient monuments and megaliths, natural ridge-tops, water-fords, etc.) and using that concept somehow in her book. Rebecca asked why the teens need the rocks if the power is really inside of them. Katelin explained that the villain, Traiken, thinks the rocks hold the power, but as the story unfolds, it is found that the power is absorbed by whoever finds the rock first. Holly brought up the term “gorp” as typically meaning trail mix and so Katelin may want to call one of the races she created another name.

Rebecca wanted to know in the beginning of the book that the king made the rock incorrectly. Katelin agreed she needs to work this idea into her book. Holly said that Tonya doesn’t sound too sympathetic since she seems like she is always afraid: Need to see some growth. Katelin agreed that she needs to work on her character arc, needs to make her character, Tonya, more sympathetic.

Cole suggested that Katelin focus some time in creating her magical system so that she knows what the rules are and then she can unveil them slowly over the course of the book. He also felt that each teen has too many powers. Holly agreed, saying that with so many powers, it would be too easy to defeat the villains. Cole liked the concept of powers affiliated with various creatures, such as the creatures of the sea. Holly agreed and also stated that not all of the teens should be able to fly.

Holly offered that in scene 10, it doesn’t seem like the subplot of the Loyloit fits. Katelin explained that there is much more to this subplot and so she will need to make sure that comes out. Cole offered that the real story is the teens and that they discover their innate strengths/personalities. So do the rocks need to be evil? Katelin said that by Book 4 the teens defeat Traiken without their newfound powers, just with their own strengths. Rebecca urged Katelin to then show how the teens have strengthened themselves over time. Holly suggested to be careful in turning their supposed weakness into their power, a la Wizard of Oz.

Cole Ruby read from Book 1, Chapter 2. Rebecca asked what does a smile “curdling” look like. She felt that curdling is a good thing. Cole and Holly tried to explain the look. Rebecca also said that the word “substantiated” sounds too formal. Cole said that the character, Mark, is very intelligent and so he would talk formally. Rebecca asked about where they were getting coffee in the cathedral. Cole explained that they were in a common room. Holly suggested more atmospherics so we get a feel of the cathedral and where they are physically.

The group expressed encouragement for Cole to learn more about what makes up a cathedral, its physical parts. The group liked his writing. Rebecca liked the name “Grace” for the missing room. Holly agreed and said that the name has many layers. Holly asked if it was illegal to sell blood and the group agreed that it was. Katelin asked why Mark joined the seminary to help people since there are many ways to help people. Cole stated that that will come out more in the book.

Read comments of other Second-and-Fourthers — and leave your own for other authors — at our Yahoo!

Who’s Up Next?
August 30: Fifth Tuesday (potluck supper and Writing Challenge readings for all Tuesday with Story members and guests), hosted by Chris and Joe Lacey, 49 London Road, near London Depot, north of Cambridge and east of Deerfield.

September 6: Greg Spry (chapter 9, Beyond Cloud Nine), John Schneller (chapter, Final Stronghold), Jennifer Hansen (chapter 2, Shadows of Yesterday), Rebecca Rettenmund (journal entry), Liam Wilbur (chapter, Scott & Rory), and Jim Cue (short story).

September 13: Holly Bonnicksen-Jones (Coming Up For Air) and Terry Hoffman (The Great Tome). Room for four more! Contact Carol at chornung88@aol.com if you want to read!

September 20: Kim Simmons (chapter, City of Summer), Pat Edwards (poems), Judith McNeil (?), Millie Mader (chapter 28, Life on Hold), and Jerry Peterson (chapters 15-16, Thou Shalt Not Murder).

Writers Mail: Duty Roster
Bring your own perspective to Writers Mail: Become an editor for a month. Here’s our roster to date:
August – Clayton Gill
September – Carol Hornung
October – Cool weather stimulates editing: Give it a try!
November – Cold weather accelerates it!
December – Clayton closes out 2011.
January – Waiting for you!

Please let Clayton or Carol know which month you’d like to edit. Thanks and write again!

The Last Word: Final Approach to Milwaukee
Most airline flights I like to get a window seat and watch the landscape flow past. When I end up in the middle or aisle seat, I use my laptop.

On a recent flight from OAK to MKE, I was sitting in an aisle seat on final approach to Mitchell Field when my laptop ran out of battery. In that last 15 minutes of the flight, I picked up Southwest Airlines in-flight magazine (Spirit, August 2011) and discovered it contained a series of one-page articles designed just for last-few-minutes-of-the-flight readers like me. Even better, there was a one-page monthly column called “Spirit Lexicon.”

The Lexicon entry for August 2011 (Entry No. 465) is “anti-language” a noun, descended from the Greek anti (opposite) and the Latin lingua (tongue), defined as: (1) a term coined by British linguist M.A.K. Halliday that refers to words and phrase understood only by those who have been briefed on their meaning; (2) a secret language used to exclude others or conceal a group’s activities.

I started to wonder why Halliday would need to coin “anti-language” when “jargon” would seem to do the same job. Then I realized that those who slip into jargon in “mixed company” including non-specialists unfamiliar with the terminology might actually try to explain their jargon to the uninitiated. That would be the courteous thing to do. However, if their terminology was part of a secret language, purposefully intended to exclude others, then they would be speaking anti-language. The would not be likely to show courtesy, or mercy.

Please send Clayton content for the next Writer’s Mail. Thank you!