Tuesdays with Story

January 21, 2010 by Cathy R.

“The essence of dramatic form is to let an idea come over people without it being plainly stated. When you say something directly, it is simply not as potent as it is when you allow people to discover it for themselves.” – Stanley Kubrick

Writing friends…

This group has been around for quite awhile—nearly a decade now. One former member and group leader, Ben LeRoy, founder of Bleak House Books and now Tyrus Books in Madison, says he was asked to take over leadership of an ongoing group of aspiring writers “sometime around 2002 or 2003” by Sherry Klinker, then the publicity manager at Barnes & Noble. Shortly afterward, the growing group split into the two sections we now have today. Ben recently offered to do a question-and-answer session with TWS members to share what he knows about books and publishing. Maybe in spring?

This week, news from another early member who continues to write and publish, Kashmira Sheth: I want to tell you my new book BOYS WITHOUT NAMES just came out yesterday. If anyone is interested I have posted pre-pub reviews on my website: http://kashmirashet h.typepad. com/

– Kashmira

Writing challenge set . . .

To your keyboards! First-and-thirders, our hosts for Fifth Tuesday – March 30 at Booked for Murder – have set the writing challenge: “A Night at the Bookstore.”

Yes, anything can happen after the last person to leave turns out the lights and locks the door. Put your story in a poem, essay or a bit of flash fiction – a really short short story. Maximum length: 400 words.

Deadline is March 22. Email your piece to Jerry Peterson.

Beat the rush. Write right now.

Commit to submit: You can submit your general fiction or young adult novel in the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award Competition starting next Monday, January 25. Upload your book, with a pitch and synopsis, before February 7 and you can participate. More info: amazon.com/Breakthrough-Novel-Award-Books/…&node=332264011

Choose to edit: The weekly e-letter, that is. Doing it will hone your left-brained skills and you’ll enjoy the process. You can (sort of) make it your own—long or short, with links or not. Maybe someone out there is good with graphics? Maybe you’d like to see this be contained in less than one page. Done in all caps or zapf dingbats? Sign up and make it happen!

Last Meeting…

Twelve writers met last Tuesday and welcomed newcomer Kimberly Simmons, a science fiction writer who just moved to the Madison area from New Hampshire. The notes:

Alicia Connolly-Lohr’s Lawyer Lincoln chapter– Pat really enjoyed the images Alicia evoked. Lincoln is fitting in with her idea of who Lincoln was. A passage describing Ashmore’s looking “dishonored” could be clearer. It’s hard to picture dishonor. Kane wants Whitmore to act as a foil for Lincoln’s internal struggle. Clayton wonders about Lincoln shadowboxing with himself in the courtroom. Something needs to bring out Lincoln’s internal conflict. Lincoln puts on his hat, but how does he do it – with two hands? Does he slam it down? End of Chapter 30, there’s no question to be answered, so why keep reading? Perhaps a name change is in order for Whitmore or Ashmore? If Lincoln is in his stocking feet, isn’t it cold?

Judith McNeil’s two very short stories – First, “TUTS.” The use of the word rationale isn’t clear. Should bracelets be compared to manacles instead of handcuffs? It brought to mind lynching for Pat. It had a playful, teenager feel to it for Alicia. Instead of doubling, different word choice, perhaps morphing or changing. Does the sales lady need to be identified as white? The actions of the two are unclear in the beginning for Clayton. If “TUTS” is in quotes, then someone spoke it and that should be explained. Secondly, regarding “Swatter”: Pat didn’t get it. Kane doesn’t like the last sentence, because it’s not a sentence. Pat wonders about the title. Judith explained that it’s about wanting to swat away the things that you size up and don’t like. Couldn’t tell how old he was until the last sentence. Narrator has to have made some eye contact. And narrator is of unknown gender. Clayton thought the ending ambiguous. Could it be a single paragraph?

Amber Boudreau’s chapter—Kimberly said it sounds like the start of a television series. The group suggested taking out the first scene, removing the ### section breaks since they imply a time elapse of hours or days, not seconds, and then pumping up the drama and slapstick to heighten the effect of people rushing to the door to escape an awkward situation. After Kane described a way to do it, Pat said, “It’s like the camera shot goes right to his shoe.” That would keep the continuity of the humor. Clayton said I like this Dad—is the basement littered with his inventions? There was some discussion on the mystery of the portal, with mentions of Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland and how or if to lightly reference the similarity.

Jerry Peterson’s short story– Biggest crock he ever wrote? Pat thought the dad would “Tom Sawyer” them into plowing his driveway. The dynamics are right – men and their machines. Pat thinks this wouldn’t play in Miami, but Clayton says there are a lot of snowbirds down there. Bill had a problem with the noise – there wasn’t enough of it. Kane had a problem with the noise too. Kilgannon should have the ultimate machine, not the old one. Instead of mittens, should the one guy be using oven mitts? Clayton wanted some placement. We’re not Norwegian, but we don’t know anyone who wouldn’t let their kid shovel. Pat pictured the narrator around ten-ish, still polite.

Clayton Gill’s Fishing Derby – Last chapter split into two. Kane sees lots of name “Miker” in one paragraph – there’s at least one too many. Jerry wanted the info to come to life, maybe the director could come along. Pat says don’t let the need for the joke hamper the story. Pat knows what it’s like to get attached to a line and have to let it go. She also wants to know what bowling pins feel like? Another question — what are the fish being bred for? Eventually for eating, but they’re near the top of the breeding pyramid, which wasn’t too clear. Kane isn’t sure about the device a character peels off and attaches to Miker’s lure. It’s an important bit of business that seems to get glossed over. Kane would like the fish to eat Asian carp, so some might advocate leaving them in, to make more conflict.

Who’s Up Next…

February 2: Clayton Gill (chapter 9, Fishing Derby), Amber Boudreau (chapter 7, YA novel), Pat Edwards (poems), Millie Mader (chapter 16, Life on Hold), Alicia Connolly-Lohr (chapter 32, Lawyer Lincoln), and Kim Simmons (???).

February 16: Clayton Gill (chapter 10, Fishing Derby), Amber Boudreau (chapter 8, YA novel), Kim Simmons (???), and Jerry Peterson (???).

From our Writers…

Joanna V. Hunter*, a member of our group, looks forward to a March 1, 2010, date for publication of her non-fiction book But He’ll Change: End the Thinking That Keeps You in an Abusive Relationship (Hazelden Books.) She says infusing her cover letter with the passion she felt for the topic helped publishers see that she was the best person to write this book. See the appendix (below) for her tips on writing non-fiction proposals. And read what she says about bringing her book, now available online with Amazon, Barnes & Noble and Hazelden, to life:

“But He’ll Change: End the Thinking That Keeps You in an Abusive Relationship grew from my own experience and research. While working on my first novel (about two women dealing with the effects of abuse) my characters internal dialog caught my attention. The statements they used to minimize and deny what was happening to them stayed with me and woke me during the night. I’d heard them all before – even used many of them myself. I jotted them down in a notebook. Before long, I had over 100 statements. Yes, but I love him. Yes, but my children need a father. Yes, but if only he’d quit drinking everything would be okay.
When I left my abusive relationship, I didn’t know what healthy thinking was. Scanning the list in my notebook, I decided to write the book I needed while healing from abuse. A book that not only educates the victim about how she was manipulated and then held in the relationship, but also how she can change her destructive self-talk to healthy thinking. While interviewing therapists on important issues (Can my partner change? Do I have to forgive him? How do I find a therapist and what should I expect from him or her?) I finished my first and second novels (Nether has sold yet,) then turned my full attention to what was then called Yes, but….

My first two rejections came from agents. I hadn’t yet learned that since this is not-fiction, I didn’t need an agent to sell the book. I read books on writing proposals and searched publishers’ websites to learn what they wanted in a proposal. (See information below.) Six months and 100 pages later, my proposal was finished. For non-fiction, if the author is sending out multiple submissions, etiquette requires that fact be included in the cover letter. Publishers don’t like multiple submissions, and some refuse to look at work sent that way. So I didn’t do that. After two rejections from publishers, I rewrote my formal cover letter and punched-it-the-heck-up with the passion I have for the subject. I also, included a letter from a therapist who actually used my book with two patients, articles I’d written on the subject and ones written about the work I do educating teenagers, medical personnel and others in my community and outside it.

I sent my proposal to Hazelden in February of 2008. After the respectful waiting time of three months, I gave them an additional month before I called. Yes, they were interested, but others had to see it. I paced the floor a month before I made another call to them. Yes, it’s moving in the process and doing well — my pace quickened and my carpet wore thin. On Halloween I received the call I’ve been waiting for, yes, they wanted the book. Do I have to say I did the happy-dance all over the house?

Next were contract negotiations. Since this was my first experience with a 12-page contract, I had an attorney look at it. I did get a better deal, but I don’t think it was worth what the attorney charged. Contract signed, Hazelden wanted the full manuscript. By March 2009, assigned an editor, the rewrite began. We worked through email and phone calls. She was an enormous help in re organizing and rethinking the parts that were weak. Hazelden was kind enough to allow me to weigh in on the title change from Yes, but: Fighting the Self-Talk that Keeps you Stuck to But He’ll Change: End the thinking that Keeps You in an Abusive Relationship. They have the right to name the book and choose the cover. In the contract, I had agreed to have a finished product by August 1, 2009. We made the deadline. I saw the book one more time when it was set in pages. Be still my heart — that was thrilling. My baby floated away and into cyberspace with a publication date of March 1, 2010. It is already on Hazelden, Barnes & Noble and Amazon’s websites — another thrill.

Finally, I will work with the marketing team to get the book selling. I’ll keep you posted.”

*pseudonym

One Person’s Slush (Used to Be) Another Person’s Treasure…

James Michener once said he wasn’t worried his 1957 Tales of the South Pacific would get lost in the heap of unsolicited manuscripts editors call the “slush pile” or beaten to publication by a discovered work languishing there. Said Michener, who once toiled as a slush reader: “If you ever read a slush pile you’d know I had nothing to worry about.”

Still, getting picked from the slush pile used to be a writer’s long shot. And true gems have emerged from there, including Stephanie Myers’ Twilight and Judith Guest’s Ordinary People written in 1975, a book that went on to become a movie as well.

Now, however, it looks as if this bastion of good luck is going the way of the metal embossed library card. Book publishers won’t read work that an agent hasn’t suggested. Film and television producers won’t read anything unagented for another reason—they fear being accused of stealing ideas and material. And magazines say they can’t afford staffers to weed through the mess looking for The Next Big Thing. One publishing spokesman even linked the pile’s demise to 9/11, saying the attack gave overworked book trade folks even less incentive to open unfamiliar mail.

All is not lost. That nagging fear of missing out on the next great undiscovered novel has prompted a few “slush stalwarts” to continue on against daunting odds. Read about in Katherine Rosman’s Wall Street Journal article at online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748703414504575001271

Writer’s Craft: Help One Another…

A group of scribes that has gained some notoriety out in the Rockies—the Crested Butte Friends of the Library—has put together a score sheet to evaluate mainstream adult fiction. Some of this might be helpful to us when evaluating a writing piece:
http://www.readersintherockies.com/page.cfm?pageid=6435

Words & Language…

Another great word from Paul McFedries at WordSpy:

Mommy card noun: A calling card that includes a mother’s name and contact information. Also: mom card.

Example citation: “Being a parent is a job in itself, which is exactly why Carrie Hendrix developed “mommy cards,” business cards for parents…Depending on the design chose, some mommy cards come with a bit of ribbon snaked through them. It makes them stand out from the everyday card, Hendrix said. –Allison Miles, “Several Crossroads business jazz up their business cards.” Victoria Advocate, July 26, 2009.
Related words: alpha mom, bio-mom, hockey mom, momic, NASCAR dad, office-park dad, security mom, Twilight mom.

A momic is “a comedian who is a mother who primarily discusses motherhood in her act.” Can be used as an adjective: momical.

Conferences You Can Attend…

Two coming up through the University of Wisconsin writing center:

So You Want to Start That Novel with Angela Rydell, Jan. 30, 12:30-4:00 p.m., Lowell Center, 610 Langdon St. With on-the-spot exercises, take your ideas for characters and a story and make them finally happen. $55.

From Notebook to New Work: A Journaling Workshop with Angela Rydell, Wed., March 24 through April 7, 6:45-8:30 p.m., Lowell Center, 610 Langdon St. Recharge your writing, whether it be poetry, memoir, or other avenues. Exercises keep the pen moving. $90.
Contact http://www.dcs.wisc.edu/lsa/writing

The Last Word…

August Derleth inspired many writers and touched many readers. A January excerpt from his 1963 book Countryman’s Journal:

“I woke this morning to a year ushered in on the north wind with snow. The daylight was just beginning to flow outside, snowflakes whispered at the panes, and the wind talked at the eaves—though beyond its sound I heard the querulous quai-ee of quail just outside the house.”

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What I learned about proposals:
The most important thing a publisher wants to see in a proposal is the writer’s passion for the subject matter.
Questions publishers want answered in your proposal:
• What new insight do you have on the subject? How will you communicate that insight?
• Why did you write the book?
• What makes you the best person to write this book?
• What other books like yours are on the market? How is yours different?
• Who is your audience? How would you market your book?
• Who are you?
They often ask for one or two chapters. These chapters don’t have to be an exact chapter from your book, but one created for the proposal with the best of your information, powerfully written. They often ask for your Table of Contents and a short summary of each chapter. – Joanna V. Hunter