Posts Tagged ‘Kristin Oakley’

Writer’s Mail
Tuesdays with Story
February 9, 2018


Welcome home – Pat Edwards, back from wintering in Arizona, and Kashmira Sheth, back from visiting family in India, joined eight of their colleagues to discuss the works of seven members Tuesday evening. Here are some of the thoughts shared:

Millie Mader (poems, “Loss” and “Reflections on Ancient Ephesus”) . . .  I read two poems, but didn’t get much critiquing. Jerry suggested changing a line, which I’m going to do. Trying to get a bit caught up with my short story.

Jack Freiburger (four poems, “Fred Goff”, “Late Snow”, “Memorial Day”, and “Last Hay”) . . . Not a lot of feedback as I’m not sure how comfortable most of the group is editing poetry, but generally positive responses and fewer grammatical errorsfound than usual. Will really try to get on Synopsis of A Walk Upon the Water novel for a month from now.  Will be in CA working on a mobility engineering project for disabled athletes the 20th, plus a few winery tours.


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Writer’s Mail
Tuesdays with Story
December 16, 2014

“Write your first draft with your heart. Re-write with your head. The first key to writing is… to write, not to think!” – William Forrester in the movie Finding Forrester played by actor, Sean Connery

At Barnes & Noble . . .
1st & 3rd Notes 12-16-14
Ten of us gather round the tables at the Alicia-Ashman Library Tuesday night.
Kashmira read from Chapter 11 of her and Amit’s novel. Lisa liked one line in particular about a cat. Pat was a little disappointed there was no conclusion to the character walking in the rain. Lisa missed the satisfaction of the completion of that scene as well. Jerry and Lisa wondered about the motivation behind starting the chapter from a certain character’s POV. Judith asked for some specificity in one scene. Jerry wondered why a certain reveal had to wait till the end of the day and wants the other character to push for more info. Pat liked the letters and the dream sequence.
Lisa reads from Chapter twenty-five of Tebow’s Family Secret. Jerry had a question about the train two characters get on and wants one to suffer. Pat finds the writing is getting so much better, chapter by chapter – all thanks to TWS, we’re sure. Judith had a question about the redness of character’s lipstick and if it’s important. One of the few things Pat is struggling with is if a character cares about prices consciously or unconsciously. Andy had a couple questions about POV and asks for a cliffhanger at the end.
Mike shares a poem with the group. Judith asks how the poem itself relates back to the title of the piece, a mantra about honoring the divine self. Pat thought he had some great lines and only had a question about one line in particular, can’t versus will not. There’s also an overall theme of war and fighting, but no boo-boos. Lisa asks if the blue light means something and Mike explains it’s a pearl and the color of shiva’s skin. (more…)

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