Tuesdays with Story

Writer’s Mail
Tuesdays with Story
August 10, 2018

Tuesday eve at ye olde book shoppe

Eight writers came out Tuesday evening to critique the work of six of our colleagues. Here’s some of what was said:

Kashmira Sheth (chapters 4-5a, Surya’s Story): Kashmira submitted more chapters from her MG novel. There were some spelling and word choice concerns that Tracey and Jerry pointed out. Jack wanted some tightening to make sure Surya’s fear and desperation came through. There were discussions about the lemon grass, step-well, python etc. Overall, everyone like the story.

Lisa McDougal (chapter 01, The Tebow Family Secret): Tracey suggested that the intro be told in first person. Bob said that the intro could be told in the 3rd if done more creatively. Jerry questioned if a billionaire would come home and get soda himself. Millie and Tracey gave suggestions on a new name for one of the characters. “Dotty” was the winning name. Larry and Jerry had questions/suggestions about the key code lock for the wine cellar.

Larry Sommers (chapters 1-2, Izzy): On the subject of my new “gentle, nostalgic coming of age story” about young Izzy Mahler, there was general consensus that I’ve been using too many points of view, conflicting and confusing time frames, and also failing to inject notable elements of drama, tension, suspense, etc.  Back to the drawing board!

Jack Freiburger (chapter 11, A Walk upon the Water): Chapter seemed well received.  Tracey suggested a flip of two paragraphs, which made eminent sense.  Other comments were either grammar errors or positive.

Tracey Gemmell (chapters 1.5-2, Lavender Wine): General agreement that Cassie’s compass needs recalibrating in a figurative sense and that the scene where she transitions from relief to fainting needs work. Jerry, Larry and Lisa feel the flashback within a flashback needs to change to Cassie recounting the entire hospital scene to Isabella, instead of viewing it through the children. Larry likes the Isabella character. Jerry provided extensive edits. Grateful for everyone’s efforts. Thank you.

Jerry Peterson (short story, part 1, “Death Rides the Rails”) . . . Would Woody Guthrie introduce himself as Woody Guthrie, asked Jack. Several agreed it would be better if he introduced himself as Woodrow, that we would figure out later that he’s Woody when he sings one of his well-known songs. All asked for a longer story than Jerry said he intended to write, that the Depression of the 1930s is rich in both resource and story material.

Who’s up next

August 21

Lisa McDougal (chapter 02, The Tebow Family Secret)

Millie Mader (???)

Bob Kralapp (???)

Meg Matenaer (???)

Cindi Dyke (???)

Amber Boudreau (chapter, Avice)

John Schneller (chapter, Final Stronghold)

Our editor

For August, it’s Tracey Gemmell. Email your news to her so she can include it in the next edition.

News from Deb Cleveland

Deb had to miss Fifth Tuesday.

“I’m still recovering (from knee surgery) and not getting out too much. I’m finally off the Big Boy drugs, so can drive myself, but not ready to venture far. I’m back to working on the re-write on my book and hope to be finished by late fall. I hope to join you again soon.

“As most of you know I’ve been away from blogging for a while. But now I’d like to invite you to check out my new blog, The Traveling Writing Room, and my new website at debclevelandwrites.com. I’d love to hear what you think and to subscribe if you’re so inclined. Also feel free to share this with others you think might enjoy my adventures in writing and life.”

– Deb

Save bucks buying books

From Bookbub dot com: Earlier this year, the price on the blockbuster book, The Girl on the Train, was slashed from $11.99 to $1.99 for one day only.

Previously, Gone Girl was discounted from $9.99 to $2.99, and The Da Vinci Code was given away for free for one week. In all three cases, the discounts were only available for the ebook version.

Most people were completely unaware of these huge deals.

A select group of readers, however, had the inside scoop on all these deals and more. They were using our service at BookBub, a daily email that alerts readers to free and deeply discounted ebooks that are available for a limited time.

More than 7 million people have signed up for BookBub’s free service. Readers sign up with just an email address, and then select their favorite genres. Each day, we send an email with free and discounted bestselling ebooks in the selected genres. Just click, download, and read on any device: Kindle, Nook, iPad, iPhone, Droid, and more.

Each book is at least 75 percent off, and many are free.

Query Letter Resource: For those struggling through query letter compositions, here’s a resource from Jane Friedman: https://www.janefriedman.com/query-letters/. BTW, she’s scheduled to appear at the Writers’ Institute next April.