Tuesdays with Story

Writer’s Mail
June 3, 2014

“A writer lives, at least, in a state of astonishment. Beneath any feeling he has of the good or evil of the world lies a deeper one of wonder at it all. To transmit that feeling, he writes.” — William Sansom

Member news…
Kristin Oakley, second-and-fourth, brought out her first novel, Carpe Diem, Illinois, back in April, Little Creek Press of Mineral Point the publisher. Saturday afternoon, she will be at Printers Row Lit Fest in Chicago, and Thursday evening next week (June 12) she will be at Mystery To Me Bookstore here in Madison. Book talk and signing, of course.

At this Tuesday’s meeting…
Millie read from Chapter Fifty­four of Life On Hold. Andy P. wondered how necessary the whole training in Chicago is to the story. Jerry suggested a way to make it work while simultaneously making the main character’s life more miserable. Lisa expected the chapter to end differently. Pat thought a couple of paragraphs could be worked in more neatly during later dialogue. Lisa pointed out that Oak Park is not in Chicago. Cindi suggested playing up the creepiness in a particular moment. Andy B. appreciated the comedic potential provided by a couple characters.
Amber presented a synopsis of Noble to the group. Lisa suggested writing up something to be read in under two minutes. Kashmira suggested bringing some of the tone of the story into the synopsis. Pat thinks speaking it out loud could make it more smart­alecky/snarky (in a good way). Andy P. offered up praise for the protagonist as a character.
Kashmira and Amit shared Chapter Three of their as yet untitled novel. Lisa said she had never read seventeen pages as fast as these. She did say she got a little lost with who was telling the story now and then, but it was decided that that might be due a quirk with MAC document transfers. Pat thought the images were vivid and lyrical, but voiced a concern that the tone seems skewed toward a younger audience. Millie liked the metaphors throughout. Jerry noted that some words aren’t typical for a six­year­old, but Andy B. pointed out that these sections are the older version of the character recalling the story.
Cindi shared Chapter Ten and Eleven of her novel, North Road. Pat liked the conversation portion of Chapter Ten, but thought that it would be stronger if the protagonist was present and involved. Andy P. was looking for more personality in the characters – enough so that he couldn’t distinguish between them. Jerry suggested cutting some backstory. Pat suggested the group look into the book Lost Lake by Sarah Addison Allen, which gives some great examples of withholding backstory until absolutely necessary. Andy P. didn’t think any of the details at the airport were necessary if nothing happened along the way. Pat thought the dialogue and metaphors were great. Kashmira imagined the scene as a play in the sense of not wanting to have characters show up before their scenes. Jerry noted the last paragraph of Chapter Eleven could be cut because of POV.

Andy P. read from Chapter Nineteen of The Void. Pat thought the dialogue in Chapter Nineteen was more believable than in Chapter Eighteen and previous chapters, but she wonders about an abused character’s motivation to spill her story. Jerry thought it was strange that a character would divulge that info on a first date. Andy B. saw events leading up to the point where one character would tell another that they don’t do relationships well. Kashmira found the dialogue exchanges a little long. Cindi had a question about the characters’ appetites.
Jerry read from Chapter Three of Rubbed Out, his new novella. Andy B. wondered about muscle milk and a character’s choice of beer. Kashmira liked the setting of the scene. Millie enjoyed the cliffhanger. Pat thought he should give one character in an earlier chapter a Maglite because it could double as protection. She was also impressed with how soon everyone showed up on the edge of town in Chapter Two.

Who’s Up Next…
June 10: Rebecca Rettenmund (chapter, Lookout), Jen Wilcher (new story), Jack Freiburger (???), Ruth Imhoff (???), and Liam Wilbur (???). Room for one more.
June 17: Lisa McDougal (chapter, Tebow Family Secret), Andy Brown (chapters 4, Man Before the Fall), Cindi Dyke (chapters, North Road), Pat Edwards (???), John Schneller (chapter 2, Final Stronghold), and Judith McNeil (chapter 14, My Mother, Savior of Men).
July 1: Amber Boudreau (chapters, Stone), Millie Mader (chapter 55, Life on Hold), Kashmira Sheth & Amit Trivedi (chapter 4, novel), Bob Kralapp (short story part 6, “Hole in the Wall”), Andy Pfeiffer (chapters, The Void), and Jerry Peterson (chapters, Rubbed Out).

This month’s editor…
Something you want included in Writers Mail this month? Andy Brown is the editor.
Ruth Imhoff takes on the job for July, and second-and-fourth is searching for an editor for August.

Great word…
From Word Spy Paul McFedries:
boiling the frog
Meaning: (pp.) Slowly increasing a negative stimulus that would otherwise be rejected if performed all at once.
Example Citations:
“It will be many years of minus four, and minus three, and minus 2 percent growth, rather than a minus 50 percent all in one quarter is my prediction. It probably will take a four, maybe five years. But that’s plenty for young companies to grow under the umbrella, if it’s a large market.
So we’re just boiling the frog until that happens.”
– Jon Xavier, Nimble CEO: Why we‘re doing well when everyone else in storage struggles, Silicon Valley Business (California), February 20, 2014
“I constantly see ad supported services ‘boiling the frog.’ Hulu was 1 ad, then 2, now 3 per break (and I pay for this).”
– Billy Chasen, I constantly see…, Twitter, May 21, 2014
Earliest Citation:
“Rudolf said under the IMF and World Bank policy, the Public Utilities Regulatory Commission (PURC) is expected to continue hiking water rates until a market rate is achieved. This policy, he called ‘boil the frog’ method of rate-setting explaining that just as a frog does not struggle if water temperature is gradually raised to the boiling point, it is assumed that consumers will not struggle if rates are increased gradually to market levels.”
– The effects of water privatisation on women, Africa News, June 5, 2003
Notes:
First, this idiom comes from the old legend that if you put a frog in boiling water it will immediately jump out, but if you put the frog in cold water and then slowly turn up the heat, the frog will eventually get boiled alive. Second, the operative word here is “legend.” If you tried this experiment, the frog would most certainly jump out of the water before it got too hot. The story is pure humbug, but, as this phrase shows, the metaphor, like the frog, remains alive and well.

Writing a “killer” logline…
From Manchester author of A Kill in the Morning, Graeme Shimmin:

The classic questions used to explain anything are WHO, WHAT, WHEN, WHERE, HOW and WHY. In terms of story archetypes, they translate to:

In a (SETTING) a (PROTAGONIST) has a (PROBLEM) (caused by an ANTAGONIST) and (faces CONFLICT) as they try to (achieve a GOAL).

How does it work?
Write down where your story takes place (SETTING), who your hero or heroine is (PROTAGONIST), what they’re trying to do (PROBLEM) who’s or what is stopping them (ANTAGONIST), what major obstacle the protagonist faces (CONFLICT) and what they hope to achieve (GOAL).

Then make a sentence or two that includes all those Archetypes. Simple!

Tip: If your story is set in the modern-day in a normal town or city then there’s no need to include SETTING as the reader will assume it.

Using the Logline Generation Formula
Here’s an example of a logline for a classic spy thriller, generated using the Killogator Formula

SETTING: The British Secret Service
PROTAGONIST: A retired spymaster
PROBLEM: To find a soviet mole
ANTAGONIST: One of his former protégés
CONFLICT: He can trust no one
GOAL: To discover who the traitor is.

Put it together and what do you have?
The British Secret Service asks a retired spymaster to find a soviet mole who must be one of his former protégés. He can trust no one as he tries to discover who the traitor is.

Any guesses?
Of course, it’s Tinker, Tailor Soldier, Spy , by John Le Carré.

Find more examples and read the whole article at: http://graemeshimmin.com/writing-a-logline-for-a-novel/

Cool it…
Advice from a publishing pro who now, like us, writes books, novelist/blogger Nathan Bransford:
The publishing process is a stressful one. And despite all our best intentions, I don’t know a single person who is able to play it cool all the time. Everyone, and I mean everyone, stresses out at some point.
Which is how I very often end up with e-mails like, “OMG I THINK I JUST BLEW IT I E-MAILED AN AGENT AND IT HAD AN EXTRA PERIOD AT THE END OF IT OMG WHAT DO I DO CAN YOU UNSEND E-MAILS PLEASE HELP EMERGENCY EMERGENCY.”
And “I don’t see this covered in your FAQs, but should I spell out the word ‘Street’ when I provide my mailing address or is ‘St.’ okay?”
Deep breaths, people! (Those e-mails are fictional by the way. No authors were harmed in the making of this blog post).
A typo isn’t going to sink your query. Fiddling with tiny, inconsequential changes in your manuscript isn’t going to be the difference whether someone buys it or not if you decide to self-publish.
Success can seem so fleeting in the publishing process that it can feel like you’re about to fall off a cliff at every moment. But it’s not true. You’re fine.
When you find yourself unsure or spinning, ask yourself a very basic question: “Is this really going to be the thing that sinks my query/manuscript?”
Chances are the answer is no.
The little things won’t sink you. It can be tough to distinguish between what’s a big deal and not when you’re stressed, but try and keep your head.