Writer’s Mail
November 5, 2011
By Pat Edwards
“I do much of my creative thinking while golfing. If people know you’re working at home they think nothing of walking in for a cup of coffee, but wouldn’t dream of interrupting on the golf course.” – Harper Lee, 1926 –
Tuesday evening at the bookstore . . .
Nine First-and-Thirders and two guests gathered around a children’s table at B&N because New York Times bestselling Madison writer Jennifer Chiaverini was holding forth in the big public area, talking about her newest Elm Creek Quilters novel, “The Wedding Quilt”, the 18th book in the series.
Five writers presented chapters, mini-chapters, poems, and short stories. Here we go:
– Rebecca Rettenmund (chapter 2, The Cheese Logue) . . .
A visitor, Beth, said a paragraph where I was thinking to myself was too wordy, and had too many questions. Aaron agreed. Millie was confused that Isaiah didn’t seem very close to me. She didn’t know we were dating. She also agreed that Isaiah seemed too negative in the first chapter. Everyone looooved the poem about The Mighty Cheese Curd. Pat thought I used good active verbs and tried rapping my poem. Some of my sentences could be chopped into shorter, more precise sentences instead of linked with too many conjunctions. Pat knew what it felt like driving with little portals cut out of the ice. Jen suggested that I should remind the reader what Renaud’s Syndrome was again.
– Pat Edwards (3 poems) . . .
Comments on “Night Diorama” included confusion about the images of a diorama and the mosaic of light from the windows. Some also didn’t get the references to the Aboriginal. Everyone agreed that the impulse to look into windows at night was compelling. For “Owl Totem” some didn’t think the images were as strong; the impossibility of “scurrying cover.” For “Night Sky” most felt an emotional connection to looking up at the night sky – when they were in places where the stars were bright.
– Jim Cue (short story, In the Still of the Night) . . .
Now as for my offering, it seems to me that I spent most of my time explaining how the 400 words I read fit into a 4,000 word short story. I found a couple of questions on my papersd I’d handed out (some of them from 3 weeks ago) that I’ll try to answer now. Q. Jerkin? A. A garment, similar to a sleevless vest from the 15th / 16th century – check out painting of Sir Walter Raleigh, 1602, or Robert Dudley, 1560. Q. Geas? A. A magical compulsion, similar to a post-hypnotic suggestion. Q. Why didn’t Thrugs drink from fountain of youth? A. It wasn’t there. It only appears th those it deems worthy, perhaps one every five hundred years – or more. Q. Why was my reading so sparse on details? A. I read, was told, or somewhere along the years, got the impression that short stories are are similar to a synopsis – that is, while ANY short story can be expanded into a novel the trick is to introduce a character in such a way as to induce the reader to continue reading. Having done that, present problem (s) / challenge (s) of some sort, then show some kind of a solution that will satisfy the reader’s curiosity. Short stories of today are considerably shorter than they were 50 years ago, consequently many of the details must be left for the reader’s imagination. IF, as writers, we are good enough to skip the blatently obvious, the readers are satisfied. If not, our bank accounts go hungry….. Oops! Did I get up on a soapbox again?
– Liam Wilbur (chapter 4b, Scott & Rory) . . . No notes.
– Jerry Peterson (chapters 17-18, Thou Shalt Not Murder) . . . Big Gene Prohaska’s airport office rang true with the group. “This is a small airport,” Pat Edwards said. “I can see it, the worn-out furniture, the stained carpet.” Rebecca Rettenmund, though, found the scene in which Garrison must snatch a gold coin up from the bottom of a fish tank not believable. Two piranhas in the tank go after Garrison’s hand. “I know about piranha,” she said. “They’re really timid fish, and they have thick lips so you don’t see their teeth. But don’t change the scene. It’s really exciting.” Others agreed, calling it the best scene in the two chapters.
News of our writers . . .
Kim Simmons is now working for Humana in Madison, in a temp job during Medicare Open Enrollment.
Cathy Riddle has completed the first draft of her crime novel, “In the Hop Seat”, a mystery about murder in the craft beer industry.
Eight Ways to Make Setting Work Harder
By Kathleen Ernst
October 2011
Setting can:
1. Reveal backstory
“Rows of tidy, wood-framed houses lined either side of the street. Some were watched over by picket fences; some had stone paths that led to sturdy-looking front doors. Most were painted white, and I wondered why this was. Orange, plum, or apple red would be easier to find in a blinding snow.”
– Together Apart, by Diane E. Gray
2. Reveal character; reveal character’s growth and change
– “My wound is geography. It is also my anchorage, my port of call. I grew up slowly beside the tides and marshes of Colleton; my arms were tawny and strong from working long days on the shrimp boat in the blazing South Caroline heat. …I was born and raised on a Carolina sea island and I carried the sunshine of the lowcountry, inked in dark gold, on my back and shoulders.”
– The Prince of Tides, by Pat Conroy
– The Ballad of Lucy Whipple, by Karen Cushman
3. Advance plot
– Iron Lake, by William Kent Krueger
4. Reflect tone
– Breakup, by Dana Stabenow
“Rider made a move to turn down Arcadia but Bosch pointed toward the old pueblo, the place when the City of Angels was founded. He wanted to take the long way and walk through. Bosch studied the mud-walled structure behind the musician and wondered if Don Francisco Avila had any idea what he was helping to set in motion when he staked his claim to the spot in 1818. A city would grow tall and wide from this spot. A city as great as any other. And just as mean. A destination city, a city of invention and re-invention. A place where the dream seemed as easy to reach as the sign they put up on the hill, but a place where the reailty was always something different. The road to that sign on the hill had a locked gate across it.”
– The Closers, by Michael Connelly,
5. Heighten conflict
– Winter Study, by Nevada Barr
6. Provide authenticity
– The Winter Room, by Gary Paulson
7. Become a character
– No Colder Place, by S. J. Rozan
8. Tighten your prose
– p. 3-4 in Bull Run, by Paul Fleischman
BOOK REVIEW: “ HEAT RISES” by RICHARD CASTLE
Reviewed by Millie Mader
Who out there watches ABC’s CASTLE on Monday nights? If you don’t, maybe you should. It’s an oxymoron of murder mystery, clever stories and pun-filled dialogue. Sharing the stage with protagonist, Beckett, is best-selling murder mystery writer, Richard Castle. Beckett is an attractive lead detective, whose cases are being shadowed by Castle. Their chemistry is apparent, and teases the audience.
These past two years there have been three best sellers attributed to Richard Castle. I have searched in depth for the ghost writer who uses the pseudonym of our hero, but have had no luck. The series is owned by ABC, and I gleaned one small piece of information. It is probably a combined effort of the series’ writers, with a possible assist from Michael Connelly or James Patterson. The novels do, indeed, have some of the tongue-in-cheek double-entendre of those authors. These gentlemen also appear in Castle’s monthly poker games.
All of the novels feature a pretty and clever detective named Nikki Heat. She is the paper-page twin of Beckett—same acumen at solving crime, and very similar repartee. In the books, Richard Castle is called Jameson Rook, a Pulitzer- prize winning journalist. He, too, fits the image of his TV twin. The assisting detectives, although having different names, are also replicas of their TV personalities. In this third best seller, Nikki and Rook have moved into the realm of lovers.
Heat Rises is a crazy quilt of characters, killings and close encounters. We start with a priest found murdered in a bizarre manner at an underground S&M parlor. The yarn that holds the quilt together is cross-stitched in a seemingly pattern-less aberration. New York cops gone bad lurk in the shadows. Both Nikki and Rook face almost certain death at several junctures. Ski-masked figures race across the pages. One cannot guess where the pattern is leading. I resisted the urge to peek at the ending.
The final chapter deftly knits the loose ends of the yarn together, with a twist that will leave the reader breathless.
Who’s up next . . .
November 8: Jack Freiburger (chapter, The Path to Bray’s Head), Holly Bonnicksen-Jones (chapter, Coming up for Air), Terry Hoffman (chapter, The Tome), and Cole Ruby (chapter, Champions).
November 15: Judith McNeil (???), Aaron Boehm (screenplay/part 13, Hell Cage), Millie Mader (chapter 30, Life on Hold), Greg Spry (chapter 14, Beyond Cloud Nine), John Schneller (chapter, Final Stronghold), and riding alternate Jerry Peterson (chapters 19, Thou Shalt Not Murder).
November 29: Fifth Tuesday . . . Second-and-Fourth group hosts at Jack Freiburger’s farm.
December 6: Rebecca Rettenmund (chapter 3, The Cheese Logue), Beth Turner (???), Liam Wilbur (chapter 5, Scott & Rory), Jim Cue (short story), Jennifer Hansen (???), and Greg Spry (chapter 15, Beyond Cloud Nine).
Everything you need to know about Fifth Tuesday . . .
It’s the Three F’s once more . . . food, fun, and fellowship when our two groups gather at Jack Freiburger’s Hickory Knoll Farm on November 29. Plug Jack’s address in your GPS and you’ll get there: 5438 Highway M, Fitchburg. The farm is a bit west of Highway 14, between Fitchburg and Oregon.
Food . . . Pot luck. Fill your lucky pot with some really great food to put out on the serving table.
Fun . . . The writing challenge: Turn your major character into some species of equine – a horse, mule, donkey, jackass, or maybe a vampire equine or a unicorn. Write a short short featuring that equine character, no more than 250 words, please. Another possibility, rewrite a scene from one of your own stories from an equine’s point of view. Remember, you must use the word “whip” at least once. Email your mini-masterpiece to Carol Hornung and bring a copy to read at Fifth Tuesday.
Fellowship . . . We all get together. Spouses, friends, and kids are welcome. To assure yourself a chair at Jack’s, email Carol and tell her you are coming. Also tell her the names of any guests you intend to bring. Carol’s email address is in the paragraph above.
The Last Word
“The beautiful part of writing is that you don’t have to get it right the first time, unlike, say, a brain surgeon.” – Robert Cromier
Tuesdays with Story 
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