Tuesdays with Story

Tuesdays with Story
WRITER’S MAIL for August 20, 2011

Good Words from Way Back
“Give me books, fruit, French wine and fine weather and a little music out of doors, played by somebody I do not know.” –John Keats (1795-1821), English Romantic poet, whose poetry included “Ode on a Grecian Urn” (1819) which ends with the following lines:

When old age shall this generation waste,
Thou shalt remain, in midst of other woe
Than ours, a friend to man, to whom thou sayst,
“Beauty is truth, truth beauty,” – that is all
Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.

Fifth Tuesday: UR Runnin’ Outta Clock
Question No. 1: Have you reserved your place at the feast table? If not, do so today. E-mail Jerry Peterson, and tell him you’re coming… and, yes, guests are welcome.

Question No. 2: Have you written your Writing Challenge piece? If not, e-mail your 400-words to Pat Edwards by Friday, August 26. Better yet, do it today!

Here’s the Fifth Tuesday Writing Challenge: “That is so unlike me!” Write a story, poem, or essay in which the central character is so out of character . . . a fastidious punk rocker, a vampire paramedic, an oxymoronic or malapropistic editor… you get the idea.

Chris and Joe Lacey are hosting this Fifth Tuesday at their country estate (49 London Road) north of Cambridge and east of Deerfield, which Google Maps puts at just under 30 miles from the Barnes & Noble store off Mineral Point Road on Madison’s west side: (1) East on U.S. Highways 12 & 18 (Madison Beltline), (2) north (left) on Highway 134 (County Road O), (3) west (right) on Main Street at London Depot, (4) north (right) on Holly Ridge Lane, (5) west (left) on London Road (destination on south or left side of the road).

We’re starting at 7:00 p.m.

A few First-and-Thirders are coming with the basics (let’s see… ice, soft drinks, paper plates, plastic utensils) but this event is potluck, so bring food to share. Also bring lawn chairs… and, Jerry reminds us, “Pointy sticks so you can roast marshmallows over the flames down at the fire pit.”

Reading Recap: August 16 Meeting
Our First-and-Third meeting at Barnes & Nobel Westside included readings by Pat Edwards (poems), Liam Wilbur (numberless chapter of novel Scott & Rory), Aaron Boehm (Part 10 of screenplay Hell Cage), Millie Mader (part of Chapter 27 of novel Life on Hold), Rebecca Rettenmund (poem), and Jerry Peterson (Chapters 13 and 14 of crime novel Thou Shalt Not Murder).

Pat Edwards opened the readings with her poems “The Trade” and “Yellow Easter Shoes.” The first poem dives into the funny-sad trade-offs of living alone. First-and-Thirders marveled at Pat’s snapshots of the solitary life, showing both the poignant (“You have to learn to take up the whole bed”) and the pragmatic (“Everything on the to-do list is yours”). The “trade” requires give-and-take: “You either have to pay or struggle/I’ve balanced a light fixture on my head to fasten the wire nuts”. This poem generated a lot of critical acclaim and only one minor suggestion: Change “I’ve balanced” to “I can” which would bring the whole poem into the present and demonstrate the pride born of solitary success. Pat’s second poem describes a Catholic girl’s Easter experience, including her “sin” of “Easter desire,” wishing “To strut a new bell-bottom pantsuit” and show off her “yellow easter shoes.” Several members appreciated the irony of a religious event becoming a springtime fashion show. For comparable contrasts of the work-a-day world, Jerry Peterson recommended the poetry of the current U.S. Poet Laureate, Philip Levine (http://www.loc.gov/poetry/laureate.html).

Liam Wilbur presented an unnumbered chapter from Scott & Rory in which sixteen-year-old Tom Monroe arrives at the hospital fatally injured, victim of hit-and-run. His girlfriend, Lisa Radford, follows the ambulance and provides Tom’s information to the ER staff. “Great dialogue,” Pat told Liam, “fast-moving, good use of ‘power’ verbs, cinematic description. You care immediately because here’s kid who got creamed by a drunk driver.” Other members liked Liam’s use of ironic juxtaposition: The tragic reality of Tom’s condition in contrast to the juvenile high school activities, such as “Shark Week,” which he would miss because he was in critical condition. The chapter makes use of an omniscient narrator who describes the feelings of multiple characters. Yet members found little confusion “jumping into different heads.” Liam said this chapter, which does not feature main characters Scott or Rory, helps set the stage for a coming “battle of immortals.”

Millie Mader thanked members for their help in used airplane valuation as she sought to put her main character’s budding romantic interest in a financial hole in her novel Life on Hold. In this reworked section, John Schneller recommended small changes in dialogue: “Parts and labor” instead of “parts and work” and “totaled the plane” rather than “the plane was declared ‘totaled’.” Clayton Gill wondered whether, in the early 1970s, a good kid like Scott would utter the words “Aw, shit” in front of lady-like Erin. Members appreciated the ambiguity of Scott’s relationship with his dad, who had not told his son that he had already received the insurance money for the wrecked Cessna. Main character and narrator Erin already thinks of the father as “devious.”

Aaron Boehm read from his screenplay Hell Cage in a section which builds to the “Gallows of the Damned Match,” the main event of a professional wrestling extravaganza. Main character Ray meets fellow wrestler Jack in the ring, which is protected by a demon-repelling circle. But the demon breaks the circle and enters Jack with the intention of overwhelming Ray and taking him to hell. The fight scene morphs to a “barren plain,” which is lost in fog or dust, symbolizing the struggle of good and evil on an unknown battlefield. Members reveled in the body-slam action which encourages then frightens the audience. Pat liked the emerging explication that Ray’s father was a good guy, who had faced the Faustian bargain himself. She said the dad might have said something cryptic to young Ray, which words now become helpful in Ray’s fight with the demon. Or, another member suggested, the father’s gift could be some small physical thing, a sort of talisman, but still a reminder of the father’s love and wisdom in a period of awful peril and a clue to the defeat of the demon.

Rebecca Rettenmund read her poem “The Crowd Dodger” which describes how one spectator to a Fourth of July fireworks celebration dodges away from the public spectacle and into the sanctuary of a cheese shop.

Jerry Peterson presented new chapters of his crime novel Thou Shalt Not Murder. But in Chapter 13 he committed a blunder common to writers of historical fiction — putting something in the story that didn’t exist in that period. Pat caught it. Jerry had one of his characters reading a stack of printouts. Computer printouts did not exist in 1967. “He would be reading mimeos,” Pat said. And, for those in the group who had never heard of the archaic technology, she described how mimeograph machines produced printed copies. Several members wondered why AJ let the newspaper editor in on her investigation of Teddy Wilson’s flights. In a discussion, they suggested that AJ’s father should bring the topic up during the dog-washing scene so AJ can explain why she did it.

Read comments of other First-and-Thirders – such as Judith McNeil’s critiques on three of the pieces presented August 15 — and leave your own for other authors at our Yahoo! Groups file-sharing website: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Tuesdays_With_Story/files/First%20and%20Third/2011/0816/Critiques/

Who’s Up Next?
August 23: Katelin Cummins (?), Jack Freiburger (chapter, Path to Bray’s Head), Holly Bonnicksen-Jones (Coming Up For Air), Emily Jones (?), Cole Ruby (chapter, Champions), and room for one more (bring copies).

August 30: Fifth Tuesday (potluck supper and Writing Challenge readings for all Tuesday with Story members and guests), hosted by Chris and Joe Lacey, 49 London Road, near London Depot, north of Cambridge and east of Deerfield.

September 6: Greg Spry (chapter 9, Beyond Cloud Nine), John Schneller (chapter, Final Stronghold), Jennifer Hansen (chapter 2, Shadows of Yesterday), Rebecca Rettenmund (journal entry), Liam Wilbur (chapter, Scott & Rory), and Jim Cue (short story).

September 13: Holly Bonnicksen-Jones (Coming Up For Air) and Terry Hoffman (The Great Tome). Room for four more! Contact Carol at chornung88@aol.com if you want to read!

September 20: Kim Simmons (chapter, City of Summer), Pat Edwards (poems), Judith McNeil (?), Millie Mader (chapter 28, Life on Hold), and Jerry Peterson (chapters 15-16, Thou Shalt Not Murder).

Writers Mail: Duty Roster
Join the editors of Writer’s Mail. Bring your own perspective. Here’s our roster to date:
August – Clayton Gill
September – Carol Hornung
October – Sign up today!
November – Great way to scare off winter!
December – Yep, Clayton again.
January – Make your New Year’s resolution today!

There’s are lots of months ahead, so please let this editor know you’ll volunteer: E-mail Clayton. Thanks and write again!

The Last Word: Only Hemingway
“Some writers are only born to help another writer to write one sentence.” –Ernest Hemingway

Thanks again to Jerry Peterson for “The Last Word” via The Writers Lifeline (http://www.thewriterslifeline.com/).

Clayton asked Jerry about Hemmingway’s use of “only born” which sounded to him more than a bit odd. Why not “born only”? Any difference? What do you think?

Please send Clayton content for the next Writers Mail. Thank you!