Tuesdays with Story

Writer’s Mail 10/3/2010
by Kimberly Simmons

“In Hollywood the woods are full of people that learned to write but evidently can’t read. If they could read their stuff, they’d stop writing.” ~Will Rogers

Notes from 9-21-10
Kim has good news – she’s finished her second book! About an hour before we meet.

Judith shares the end of her radio play, South to Sunday. Millie thought one character was getting nicer toward the end. Pat T. liked it, and reflects that he enjoys listening to everyone read their stories. Kim wanted to know what, “the real McCoy,” meant. Pat T. enlightened everyone. Randy thought the end was a little abrupt. Amber wondered if two characters could argue over driving responsibilities.

Aaron shares the second part of his screenplay, Hell Cage. Judith thinks the story’s tension is building a little fast. Amber questioned the introduction of a character who doesn’t have any lines in the scene. Jerry had a question about the cage opening. Millie wondered about what might happen next. Pat T. mentioned setting up a duality between language that gets used in the ring versus language that might get used backstage.

Pat T. shares the final installment of Any Port in a Storm. Jen wanted to know why thoughts were underlined. Cathy thought the ending was very satisfying, but she wondered about the sea-bat. Pat says he included the bat because his mother-in-law hates bats. And falcons are overdone. Judith thought the character was pretty tough. Jerry wants to see the men thinking about their choices instead of being told. Cathy wondered what might happen if some wit was added to the end of the story to show a connection between father and daughter.

Kim shares a chapter of The City of Summer. Jerry wanted to know what kind of pattern was shaved into the fur of one creature. Pat T. agreed giving the reader an idea of the pattern would be good. He also agreed with Bill that some additional foreshadowing would be of use. Kim tells us that the city of summer is inspired by a real place in Spain. Some of us didn’t get the chapter in time to read it and have notes. Ahem.

Jerry shares the first chapter of Thou Shalt Not Murder. Amber had a question about what forty thousand dollars might look like and why doesn’t anyone mention it if it’s so odd. Cathy thought a good way for women to relate to the main female character was to describe the boy the character had had a crush on, why she liked him, and if her tastes changed at all. Randy didn’t get one character’s obesity for a page and a half. Pat T. thought there was still a bit too much telling instead of showing.

Fifth Tuesday, Our Next . . .
Have you saved November 30 on your calendar for our next Fifth Tuesday? Second-and-fourth group hosts.

News From Our Writers . . .
Kim Simmons has finished the first draft of The City of Winter, the second novel in her fantasy series, in a hard four months of writing. Second-and-fourth group is critiquing the chapters.

And Patrick Tomlinson, like Simmons active in both groups, will step away from us for a while. Just too many demands on his time at the moment.

Who’s Up Next. . .
October 5: Randy Haselow (chapter 3, Hona and the Dragon), Clayton Gill (chapter, Fishing Derby), John Schneller (chapter 2, Final Stronghold), Amber Boudreau (chapter 16, YA novel, Jen Wilcher (chapter), Cathy Riddle (chapter 7, Beer Crimes), and Chris Maxwell (???)

October 12: Anne Allen, ?
Annie Potter, memoir
Holly Bonnicksen-Jones, Coming Up For Air
Carol Hornung, Sapphire Lodge
Randy Haselow, Hona and the Dragon
Jen Wilcher, ?
Kim Simmons, City of Winter

October 19: Kim Simmons (chapter, City of Summer), Millie Mader (chapter, Life on Hold)
Jen Wilcher (chapter), Cathy Riddle (chapter 8, Beer Crimes), Justin Schober (???), and Jerry Peterson (chapter 2, Thou Shalt Not Murder)

Funny Word Stories From Wordsmith.org
From: Rudy Rosenberg Sr (RRosenbergSr accuratechemical.com)
Subject: Re: A.Word.A.Day–camelot
Def: An idealized time or place, one regarded as enlightened, beautiful, and peaceful.
Camelot in French: a street peddler.
Camelote in French: Rubbish, trash, junk, shoddy.
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From: Donald W. Smith (donald.smith cgocable.ca)
Subject: camelot
The word camelot in French Canada means a newspaper carrier (paper boy).
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From: Tony Pivetta (apivetta aol.com)
Subject: Re: A.Word.A.Day–hades
Def: Hell.
I am reminded of The Simpsons’ episode in which Homer travels back in time to ancient Greece. While cavorting with the gods on Mt. Olympus, he does something to incur the wrath of Zeus, who sends him hurtling via thunderbolt to Hades. In the next scene, Homer’s paddling on the river Styx as the saccharin cacophony of Lady, from the execrable 1970s pop band Styx, blares all around him. “Oh, no!” he screams, jettisoning his oars to cover his ears. “This place really is hell, isn’t it?!”
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From: John L. Pearlman (jlp tiac.net)
Subject: Re: A.Word.A.Day–hades
Was it by coincidence or on purpose that the word “hades” appeared on the anniversary of Dante’s death?
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From: Alex Harrison (alex.harrison psc.wa.gov.au)
Subject: Re: A.Word.A.Day–never-never land
Def: An idealized imaginary place where everything is perfect.
There is significant reference to the Never-never as an extremely remote part of the Australian landscape, the Outback in Australia has also been termed the Never-Never, more specifically in the Northern Territory. It was referenced in A.J. Boyd’s Old Colonials, 1882:
“My soliloquy ends with the inquiry, ‘What on earth is to be done in this wretched Never-never country?'”
The Northern Territory government uses it in an advertising slogan:
“You’ll Never Never know if you Never Never go.”
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From: John Burbidge (burbidge centurytel.net)
Subject: Never Never Land
For Australians, the term “Never Never” has a special significance. It first appeared in the late 19th century to refer to the remote Outback, beyond the farthest frontiers of European settlement, almost as a mythical place to which no sane person would ever want to go. But the 1908 publication of Jeannie Gunn’s classic Australian novel “We of the Never Never” (made into a film in 1982) gave the term a more positive twist, while acknowledging its earlier, less favorable connotations. She refers to it as a place that those who have lived in and loved never, never want to leave … “a land of dangers and hardships and privations yet a land as few lands are loved — a land that bewitches her people with strange spells and mysteries, until they call sweet bitter, and bitter sweet.”
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From: Tom Priestly (tpriestl shaw.ca)
Subject: Ivory tower
Def: A place or state of privileged seclusion, disconnected from practical matters and harsh realities of life.
In 1872 French novelist Gustave Flaubert wrote, “J’ai toujours tâché de vivre dans une tour d’ivoire; mais une marée de merde en bat les murs, à la faire crouler.[I have always tried to live in an ivory tower; but a huge wave of excrement is beating against its walls, [enough] to make it crumble.”] When I was a university professor, this was my motto.
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From: Ruth Ryan (vruthryan suddenlink.net)
Subject: La la land
Def: 1. A place or a state of being out of touch with reality. 2. A place known for frivolous activities.
Just a note: after living in LA for many years I know that the term la la land does not ONLY allude to the fictitious nature of Hollywood and the movies, but also to the frequent craziness encountered just by living in a “city” so huge, and sometimes is even a reflection on the choice to live there at all.
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From: B. Benson (bbensonfl aol.com)
Subject: la la land
You forgot Ft. La de da derdale, Florida.
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Email of the Week – (Brought to you by One Up! – Be a Player.)

From: Monroe Thomas Clewis (mtc mtclex.com)
Subject: ditty
Travel Guide
From the Ivory Tower in La La Land
Camelot is close at hand,
But Never-never land
In Hades.
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From: Sonja Gross (SMHeinze2 aol.com)
Subject: persnickety
A man on an elevator with me this morning pressed a button to the floor he wanted. The button would not light up until he had pressed it about three times. Trying to make conversation, I said, “that button sure is being persnickety.” He said, “persnickety implies intent. It’s just being glitchy.” I thought, surely this gentleman subscribes to A.Word.A.Day!
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A THOUGHT FOR TODAY
“A word in earnest is as good as a speech.” -Charles Dickens, novelist (1812-1870)

Indian Summer
Nothing can steal your heart away
Quicker than Indian Summer days,
When the sun is warm and the shadows are cool,
The lake water stands like a bright blue pool.
The warm sand begs you to bare your feet
The balmy air is meadow-sweet,
Leaves are falling from colorful trees,
And nature has moved in, merely to tease…
She comes with her warm days, just to betray…
For winter is only a breath away!
~Sallie Hinds

The Last Word…
“Writing is the only thing that, when I do it, I don’t feel I should be doing something else.” -Gloria Steinem

Pat is taking over Writer’s Mail for October so please send all your stories and articles to her.