Posts Tagged ‘wordsmith.org’

Writer’s Mail for October 13, 2010
by Pat Edwards

“To write what is worth publishing, to find honest people to publish it, and get sensible people to read it, are the three great difficulties in being an author.” – Charles Caleb Colton

2nd/4th Update from the B&N
Second & Fourth is hosting!
We need a place to hold the event!
We need an event organizer! (someone to be sure we have cups, plates, etc).

Please contact Carol ASAP if you can help!

We only had a few pieces to critique, but a fair turnout Tuesday night.

Kim Simmons presented Chapter 16 of her novel, City in Winter. Annie suggested illustrating the story! She’d like to be able to see more of what’s going on. Dan said to establish earlier that the centaur armor is leather – the term breastplate implies metal. Andrea got caught on the term “Moonies” for people from Moon City. Still a little too close to the 60s-70s cult of Moonies that folks over 40 remember. Maybe play with other words for moon, like Luna. Carol said that everyone seemed to know what was going on – someone needs to say “what the hell was that?????” now and then, which would also allow for a chance to explain the magic to the readers.

Annie Potter read “Suppertime,” a chapter from her memoir. Carol’s response: “I, uh, I added a couple of commas.” Very well done, dramatic moment in the story – not much to be changed! Homemade is one word, and sorry-ass needs a hyphen. . . Dan said he wasn’t sure the girl was being shaken until the narration said “I’ve never been shaken before” so that needs a stronger description. Otherwise, very powerful.

Carol Hornung brought in a piece of another scene from Sapphire Lodge. Dan and Kim wanted to know how Saffi is experiencing the colors she equates with emotions. Kim stated that the colors are too normal – green for pain is good, but blue for authority is pretty common. Andrea suggested more specific colors: baby blue or cobalt or navy, etc. Expand the color palate. Watch the dialog, too. Saffi would say something, and Donovan would rephrase the same thing a short while later.

2nd/4th also need to find a meeting place for December, when BN commandeers our tables – any ideas??? (more…)

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Writer’s Mail

Writer’s Mail 10/3/2010
by Kimberly Simmons

“In Hollywood the woods are full of people that learned to write but evidently can’t read. If they could read their stuff, they’d stop writing.” ~Will Rogers

Notes from 9-21-10
Kim has good news – she’s finished her second book! About an hour before we meet.

Judith shares the end of her radio play, South to Sunday. Millie thought one character was getting nicer toward the end. Pat T. liked it, and reflects that he enjoys listening to everyone read their stories. Kim wanted to know what, “the real McCoy,” meant. Pat T. enlightened everyone. Randy thought the end was a little abrupt. Amber wondered if two characters could argue over driving responsibilities.

Aaron shares the second part of his screenplay, Hell Cage. Judith thinks the story’s tension is building a little fast. Amber questioned the introduction of a character who doesn’t have any lines in the scene. Jerry had a question about the cage opening. Millie wondered about what might happen next. Pat T. mentioned setting up a duality between language that gets used in the ring versus language that might get used backstage.

Pat T. shares the final installment of Any Port in a Storm. Jen wanted to know why thoughts were underlined. Cathy thought the ending was very satisfying, but she wondered about the sea-bat. Pat says he included the bat because his mother-in-law hates bats. And falcons are overdone. Judith thought the character was pretty tough. Jerry wants to see the men thinking about their choices instead of being told. Cathy wondered what might happen if some wit was added to the end of the story to show a connection between father and daughter.

Kim shares a chapter of The City of Summer. Jerry wanted to know what kind of pattern was shaved into the fur of one creature. Pat T. agreed giving the reader an idea of the pattern would be good. He also agreed with Bill that some additional foreshadowing would be of use. Kim tells us that the city of summer is inspired by a real place in Spain. Some of us didn’t get the chapter in time to read it and have notes. Ahem.

Jerry shares the first chapter of Thou Shalt Not Murder. Amber had a question about what forty thousand dollars might look like and why doesn’t anyone mention it if it’s so odd. Cathy thought a good way for women to relate to the main female character was to describe the boy the character had had a crush on, why she liked him, and if her tastes changed at all. Randy didn’t get one character’s obesity for a page and a half. Pat T. thought there was still a bit too much telling instead of showing.

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Tuesdays with Story
WRITER’S MAIL for August 6, 2010
by Clayton Gill

Another Madison with Good Ink
It was a hot and sticky night. In my backyard, the long dog day of August collapsed at last and rolled over in the dark to pant with tongue hanging out. Distant lightning bared its fangs, but I heard no bark, no growl of thunder.

Unfortunately, I heard no Tuesdays with Story members begging for ink in Writer’s Mail, either. So I prodded the laptop to attention and googled “visiting writers” plus “Madison.” Then I discovered there is another Madison, a lively writers’ place, back East in Connecticut. This New England Madison is the home of RJ Julia Booksellers (http://www.rjjulia.com/) where mystery writer Karen E. Olson regularly reads her work.

Karen has a part-time day job editing a medical journal at Yale University. But she also has seven books under her by-line, including three in a series called “The Tatoo Shop Mysteries”—every book features “ink” in the title. See http://www.kareneolson.com/index.html. For insight into Karen’s choice of narration style and point-of-view, check out her blog at http://kareneolson.blogspot.com/.

Many thanks to Greg Spry for editing Writer’s Mail during July. Please see below for the “Newsletter Duty Roster,” which needs editors to volunteer for October and November.

But hey fellow Tuesdays, we’ve got more dog days ahead, so please throw some meat – or ink – to your August newsletter editor. Always hungry, despite the heat. Thanks! (more…)

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